Brain Fart

Red shards of light outlined our silhouettes as they mingled carelessly in the long summer grass. The lake below shimmered with pristine shades of blue and silver, challenging the glory of the setting sun that lay behind it. Hills and forests encircled the scene in an infinite arc that perfectly intertwined with the pastel colors of the unpolluted atmosphere.
“I don’t want to go back,” I murmured into Will’s ear, as his hand touched my arm with the soft tone of familiarity. “I don’t ever want to go back.”
The knoll we were perched upon fell into shadow as the sun succumbed to the comforts of the other side of the globe. The barely existent light caught the intensity that shone from his sparkling blue eyes as they turned to meet my own. “I’m not going to let you abandon everything you’ve worked so tirelessly for.”
As I clung to his broad shoulders I replayed the devastating events of the past few weeks, desperately trying to find a way to salvage my career, my reputation and my family. I had become a national spectacle, a household name unknown only to the deaf landscape that surrounded me. “But I can’t fix this Will!” I cried in exasperation as I enviously gazed at the dancing stars above.
“You don’t need to fix this; you simply need to survive it.”
Although his words resonated with truth I couldn’t accept them. My weakened heart had been stripped of any remnants of confidence and hope.
We lay silently in the pale reflected starlight that emanated from the calm lake, unable to venture towards the small cabin we had never reached. My head had begun to fall towards Will’s shoulder when the power of electricity suddenly glared from behind. Will jumped and turned to face the oncoming headlights as I gained my footing in the loose soil. The vehicle inched its way down the driveway of boulders and rock, eventually halting about fifteen feet from our confused and rigid figures. A woman emerged and jogged towards us, all the while shouting “Mom! Dad!”
It was our daughter Katie, the sole confidante we had revealed our choice of sanctuary to. “What is it?” Will inquired as we both studied the angst that revealed itself in the taught lines of her face.
“He’s dead,” she whispered only slightly louder then the passing breeze.

Determination

The legacy of a life is determined by the mark one leaves behind. It has always been my dream to positively impact the course of the human race, and become an individual remembered for centuries to come. Indeed my passion for history stems from my admiration of historical figures that single handedly altered our very existence through their possession of emotions such as determination and courage. My dedicated study of the prominent characters of the past has taught me that greatness is not something that one can receive, but rather is a rare level of focus and commitment that one must achieve. If I were freed from the worldly restraints of money and material goods, I would begin my journey of helping others by becoming a pro bono surgeon. With my training and knowledge I would travel the world and provide completely free medical care to people in need. Along the way I would distribute valuable medications and medical equipment to regions that previously could not afford these resources. After a number of years into these endeavors I would hope to have enough support to start a foundation dedicated to the allocation of medical materials and hospital personnel to these impoverished areas. My accomplishments would give the world’s deprived citizens the priceless gift of good health and also a more equitable opportunity to succeed. Even though a limitless bank account would further my ability to achieve my dream of changing the face of world health care, the motivation to do so can only come from within. No matter what the circumstances are, I can realize my dreams through my desire to change the future, and leave my signature upon the history books I love so dearly.

Medicine Camp

Hawaii is a world unto itself, a diverse society that changes its inhabitants and teaches them to view one another without regard for race or economic distinction. My unique upbringing was never so apparent to me as it was when I attended the National Youth Leadership Forum on Medicine, a program that exposes youth to the medical profession through guest speakers and hospital visits. The Forum mainly consisted of upper middle class teenagers who largely ignored the few under privileged students. It upset me when my study group would not listen to Kristille, a girl from the south side of Chicago, simply because they failed to understand or accept her. Every day I could feel Kristille's frustration mount as her thoughts failed to reach the ears of our group members, who barely even looked her in the eyes when she spoke. I wanted Kristille to be heard so I referred back to her during heated discussions, encouraged her to speak her mind, and later reiterated her ideas so the group could realize the validity of her statements. Kristille appreciated my efforts, and I became the only outsider to socialize with the students from the south side of Chicago. This experience not only confirmed my dream to become a doctor, but also allowed me to realize how fortunate I am to have grown up in a culturally rich environment.

Captain Vere

Men want nothing more than order, or so Captain Vere believes. In Melville's novel Billy Budd the self-assured Captain presents obedience to the law as an ideal, and seems to propose that humans are sinful creatures who inherently need firm guidance. These ideas fundamentally contradict my personal convictions, for I side with Thoreau on the issue of universal truth, and adamantly assert that everyone possesses a common sense of morality and justice. The story of Billy Budd, a young, handsome and naturally innocent sailor who in a moment of aggression kills his false accuser and later pays for it with his life, irritated and deeply disturbed me. Initially the ship's officers want to let Billy go without punishment, understanding that Billy's striking of his superior shipmate had been unfairly provoked. However, before the papers can be signed, Captain Vere delivers a fervent speech asserting that although Billy is innocent in the eyes of God, he must be executed in accordance with the adamant laws of the British Navy. I pondered these developments and my subsequent emotions, and was convinced in the rightness of my belief that people must listen to their conscience and always do what is just, even if doing so diverges from what society deems acceptable. Through my eyes, Captain Vere chose to disobey his conscience and the laws of God to execute a man he knew was innocent in order to satisfy the simply mundane and worldly principles of law and order. In all, reading Billy Budd confirmed my belief that people need to listen to their sense of justice within if they are to attain true morality. The human conscience can prevail if we give it a chance.

Athletics

Right now I am emersed within the Varsity Tennis season, and it has been a time plagued by adversity. To begin the season, a coach that I had been helping me learn the game for over six years left, leaving me feel like I no longer had an advocate within the coaching staff. Two weeks into the season I severely twisted my ankle while running, forcing me to sit out for a week, and then continue to play through the pain for two more weeks. Right after spring break, as I finally began to feel that my angle was completely healed, I re-sprained my angle while lunging for a volley, an event that occurred only four weeks before the ILH tournament, the most important time of the season. I have now been relegated to a constant state of disability, as my ankle brace can no longer leave my body out of fear for yet another injury. This Friday the post-season begins and I will dominate all of the competition. It is my senior season, and although I know that my ankle is pretty seriously hurt, physical pain is only temporary and regret of not completing my final season will last a lifetime. Being an athlete is having such a degree of mental strength, that no level of physical effort or discomfort can keep her from acheiving her goals, because unlike the untrained, she knows that life is all about mental toughness, and only the most determined will succeed.

Decisions

I have finally received all of my admissions decisions, but I feel more anxious than ever before. I am only eighteen years old, barely old enough to vote and leave my parents without legal ramifications, how am I supposed to measure the strengths of numerous solid options against my personality and come to a decision that will affect the very course of my life. Although I am beginning to have a clear idea of what I should do, my nerves are still shaking while silent whispers of fear leave doubts embedded within my subconscious. I do believe that everything happens for a reason, and I am sure that this will work out in the end, but until I am absolutely one hundred percent positive I won't be incredibly comfortable with whatever it is that I decide. Coming from Hawaii, I just can't figure out what kind of social and cultural environment I prefer, so I hope I can gain a more legitimate grasp upon who I am and what I like as soon as possible.

Discotech

The resounding thrum of massive stereos mercilessly beating their rhythms upon the daily ravaged boards of the dance floor inspires sensations of comfort and happiness in millions of youth. After six weeks spent hopping among the discotecas of Barcelona I willingly became a convert, a girl yearning to let loose and dance in the care free environment dominated by emotional highs, and if all goes well, drama. As the most played song on my ipod, which shares the name of this post, describes, we've been waiting a long time so let's get down. It's not prophetic, but it is a statement which captures the confined and trapped paranoia that grips even the most individualistic characters of young adulthood. Rules and direction spew from every angle, from the wanted to the desperately unwanted. We all want to escape, to momentarily loose control of our actions and avoid the unavoidable pressure that surrounds the promise a young life posseses. Of course some choose to do so through substances, others through sport and activity, and others through the discotech. If one can't understand or comprehend the pure adrenaline rush a disco can provide one only needs to listen to Young Love's "Discotech" to taste the tingling of excitement. Let go and dance.